The birth story of my new website; 6 stages of (an actual) change

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Hello, love! Chances are that this is the first time you have ever entered my website (in which case WELCOME!) but if not, then you’re probably like, “What the heck?! What happened? Am I at the right address?!”

YES, you are, buttercup! But you know, life happens sometimes and especially, when it’s combined with the New year, Dark Moon, Mercury retrograde and all the other  more or less hippie stuff that’s totally out of your control, you’re simply forced to finally face the music. Well, at least I was!

Websites. You can literally spend a lifetime playing with them, creating and loving them as well as trying to make them perfect when in fact, no one really cares, and hating them to the very core of that freaking code you’ll never understand anyways.

With websites there’s always something MORE you can make, the to-do list is pretty much endless and so it’s super easy to get trapped in a state of either a constant freak out and obsessing about it or in absolute resignation when you rather do nothing at all.

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Well, being a little bit of a (proud, of course) control freak, the first scenario applies to me most of the times which is why I do realise it can be really hard to work with me sometimes. I’m that “Could you please move that button 1mm to the left and make it slightly more but not too pink for me” type of a person. But at the same time I just feel like it’s MY website, it’s the ultimate representation of who I am in the virtual world and so… I freaking wanna have it my way without having to beg anyone for making it happen!:-))

 

So yeah… That’s the reason why you’re now looking at a website that’s completely different from the one I had yesterday. Because changing things is usually super hard but sometimes it just has to be done.

 

And since we’re already talking about it, here’s a little step-by-step guide on HOW to make any change actually really happen. It worked pretty well for me so you might wanna give it a go too!

 

A friendly hint: not trying to skip any of the stages will actually move you forward faster.;-)

 

6 stages of (an actual) change:

1) The realisation stage:

You know that little Hallelujah moment when you’re like, “OMG, I doesn’t have to be this way! I can change things!”

Well, that’s the first inevitable stage!;-)

2)  The freak out stage:

The usual, “Oh nooooooo!” moment when all the disastrous ideas are running through your head…

“What the hell am I supposed to do?! I have no idea what to do! Someone tell me what to do!”

“How on Earth am I going to ever make this work again?”

“How am I gonna explain this to anyone?”

“This actually IS the end of the world!”

This stage is a hard one. But it’s so important and necessary and once you realise that it’s actually healthy too, your life will get much better! So let it come and go and freak out as much as you want, darling. I surely did.

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3) The final decision stage:

This is where you move from fear into anger. In other words, you (finally) get mad enough to say, “Hey, mate, I’m really grateful for everything you’ve done for me, I love you and everything but this is not working for me.” (or something like that)

And so you make the final decision. You take THE step that often times feels rather like a leap of faith but you just know there’s no way around it.

Now it’s all up to you. Which is soooo liberating but it can also lead to…

4) The self-pity party stage:

This is the ‘feeling like a total victim dragged by everything and everyone’ stage. Looks like a big step back but actually, it often is a time of deep healing. Because every loss, no matter how big or small should be mourned, love. That’s why throwing a little self-pity party can ultimately help you to move on a bit faster.

Some highly recommended activities include watching Pixar movies, listening to wistful music (Tom York and other wonderfully depressive geniuses are a great choice) and drinking a number of glasses of wine of course.

5) The super excited stage:

The moment when you get bored of eating chocolate and drinking wine (yes, that can actually happen), you get out of your bed and come back inspired and super charged by all the new, cool ideas!

“OMG, what if I just made the whole website all over again? And what if I actually used all those silly naive pictures of mine I always loved making anyways? And what if I installed all those cool plug-ins and had a freebies sections and… ?!?!

OMG, this is gonna be so awesome!!”

And then, driven by all this ‘being excited like a little kid again’ energy you finally get up and get some shit done.

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6) The ‘You’ve made it!’ stage:

The final stage of this crazy ride. The one I’m in right now when I’m typing this. The stage when all of a sudden you’re looking at something you’ve worked your bum off for and… It’s DONE!

And you marvel.

You say, “High-five”!

You have yet another glass of wine (celebratory this time!) and just feel super proud of yourself.

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